A Guide to Pronouns Usage

Pronouns are a normal part of how people talk and write every day. Using the pronouns someone shares is a simple way to show respect and help people feel seen.

This guide explains pronouns, shares examples (including gender-neutral and neopronouns), and offers practical tips for what to do in everyday situations鈥攑lus where to find support if misgendering is happening.

Learn the Basics

Whether you鈥檙e new to the topic of pronouns or want a quick refresher, review the basics of pronouns.

Why Pronouns Matter

Pronouns are words people use to refer to someone, often instead of a name (like she, he, they). Pronouns often communicate information about someone鈥檚 gender.

Example: 鈥淚 wonder if she knows she left her water bottle in the classroom.鈥 Many people would assume the person identifies as a woman.

Because pronouns can signal gender, people sometimes guess someone鈥檚 pronouns based on appearance. That can lead to using the wrong pronouns.

Misgendering

Using pronouns that don鈥檛 match someone鈥檚 gender identity is called misgendering. For example, saying 鈥渉e鈥 when a person uses 鈥渟he鈥 or using 鈥渉ers鈥 instead of 鈥渢heirs.鈥

Misgendering can be especially upsetting for transgender and nonbinary people. It can feel invalidating or dehumanizing and cause a loss of belonging at 麻豆免费版下载Boulder. If misgendering happens repeatedly, intentionally or in a hostile way, it may be harassment or discrimination.

Common and gender-neutral pronouns听

Many people use common pronouns like she/her or he/him.听听

They/them are commonly used as gender-neutral pronouns. While many people learned 鈥渢hey鈥 as plural, it is also accepted as a singular pronoun.

Example: 鈥淎 student in my office needs to know if they have to fill out form 1219.鈥

Not using pronouns at all (using a name instead)

Some people prefer not to use pronouns. Instead, they want others to use their name.

Example: Instead of 鈥淪he went to the game,鈥 say 鈥淛uanita went to the game.鈥

Using someone鈥檚 name can also help when you:

  • Don鈥檛 know someone鈥檚 pronouns
  • Are worried you might get it wrong
  • Can鈥檛 remember their pronouns in the moment

Individual Identity and Choice

People use pronouns in different ways. This section shares common pronouns, gender-neutral pronouns, neopronouns and what it means when someone uses more than one set. It also includes options for when someone doesn鈥檛 want to share pronouns or prefers not to use pronouns at all.

Neopronouns

Some people use newer pronouns (often called neopronouns) to avoid gendered language.

Examples include:

  • zi/zir (pronounced zee/zeer)
  • zem/zemself (pronounced zem/zem-self)
  • fae/faer/faeself (pronounced fay/fair/fay-self)
  • ey/em/emself (pronounced ay/em/em-self)

Examples in sentences:

  • 鈥淶e went to the store to pick up milk.鈥
  • 鈥淧lease give a piece of cake to faer.鈥
  • 鈥淩oxie is confident in emself.鈥

Using more than one set of pronouns (she/they, he/they)

Some people use more than one set of pronouns. This usually means either set is okay, and you can use them interchangeably.

Example: 鈥淪he thought she knew the answer, but now they are uncertain.鈥

Sharing pronouns (and not sharing)

When introducing yourself, you may choose to include pronouns.

Example: 鈥淗ello, my name is Jamal, and I use he/him pronouns.鈥

Sharing pronouns can:

  • Invite others to share (if they want to)
  • Help normalize pronoun sharing
  • Reduce assumptions about gender

Some people don鈥檛 want to share their pronouns, and that鈥檚 okay. If someone doesn鈥檛 share, use their name instead of pronouns.

Practicing Respect and Inclusion

Learn tips for sharing your pronouns, using inclusive language, correcting mistakes and building habits that help you get pronouns right over time.

Handling mistakes

Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. If you use the wrong pronoun, a quick correction is usually the best.

Example: 鈥淪orry鈥攖hey were just here.鈥

Try not to over-apologize or make it a big moment. That can put pressure on the other person to comfort you.

Building good habits

If you struggle to remember someone鈥檚 pronouns:

  • Practice at home
  • Ask a friend or colleague (not the person being misgendered) to help correct you
  • Use the person鈥檚 name until you鈥檙e confident

Pronouns matter like names do. Most people wouldn鈥檛 keep using the wrong name鈥攑ronouns deserve the same effort.

Inclusive practices you can use right away

  • Add pronouns to your email signature
  • Add pronouns to your name tag or badge
  • Practice neopronouns so they feel more familiar
  • Gently correct misgendering when you hear it, for example: 鈥淛iwong uses she pronouns.鈥
  • Use inclusive language beyond pronouns, for example: Say partner instead of husband/wife
  • Use inclusive group greetings鈥攅veryone, folks, y鈥檃ll, people鈥攊nstead of 鈥渓adies and gentlemen鈥
  • Choose gender-neutral terms, when possible, like 鈥渇irefighter鈥 instead of 鈥渇ireman鈥

Gender-neutral titles (honorifics)

Honorifics like Ms., Mrs., and Mr. are gendered. Gender-neutral options include:

  • Mx. (pronounced 鈥渕ix鈥)
  • M. (pronounced 鈥渆m鈥)

Examples:

  • Mx. Jones went to Italy to visit the Vatican.
  • Dear M. Jones, we hope you enjoyed your time with us at our hotel.

Because not everyone recognizes these titles, some people add a brief note (like an asterisk) explaining they鈥檙e using gender-inclusive language.

Find Support and Resources

If misgendering is happening, especially repeatedly, support is available. This section outlines 麻豆免费版下载Boulder resources, reporting options and links for learning more.

If you are being misgendered

麻豆免费版下载Boulder supports transgender and nonbinary identities and has policies that address misgendering. The Pride team can provide educational resources and support.

Students experiencing repeated or ongoing misgendering can contact the Pride team for:

  • Support and guidance
  • Help planning how to address the situation
  • Strategies for intervention
  • Help with educating others

If misgendering continues, the Pride team can also help with reporting through the Office of Institutional Equity and Compliance (OIEC).

Policy

麻豆免费版下载Boulder policy prohibits discrimination and harassment based on protected-class identity. Gender identity, gender expression and sexual orientation are protected classes at 麻豆免费版下载Boulder. Unfair treatment or intimidating behavior based on these identities is reportable to the university.

Further learning

If you want to learn more about pronouns and gender-inclusive language, these resources can help: